Monday, April 1, 2019

Rogue's Angels Present: Edger Lives by David Beem

Please welcome David Beem author of Edger Lives

David Beem will be awarding a $25 Amazon or B/N GC to a randomly drawn winner via rafflecopter during the tour.


Edgar Lives
by David Beem 

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GENRE: Comedy, Action/Adventure

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BLURB:

Our dork of destiny rides again!

Edger is falling for Mary, his bodyguard, kick-ass spy, and cover wife. But she’s so hopelessly out of his league, it’s clear someone’s going to get hurt. Less clear? That someone may be the Prime Minister of Australia.

When Mary confesses her desire to kill the world leader whose assassination Edger’s supposed to prevent, Edger’s superpowers pick the worst time to stop working. Without a fully functional psychic superhero, their team of spies can no longer order him to probe Mary’s mind for ill intent. The stage is set for a confrontation that threatens to strip a defenseless Edger of his loyal protector just when he needs her most.

Return to the Collective Unconscious, this time with Listerine-chugging stoners, Hollyweirdos, commie-alien-kung fu robots, one space gorilla-unicorn, and an exceedingly lovesick Vladimir Putin.

Mind your fingers and toes on page 270. Those skydiving mind-control monkeys have been known to bite!
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EXCERPT:

I find Mary in the walk-in closet after her workout. Three of her peering back at me with wide eyes. Four, if we count the sweaty, pheromone-blasting, flesh-and-blood Mary in the middle.

Her hands glide down her hips as she turns sideways. The mirror reflections copy her like evil clones. Her head tilts, and her unreadable gaze scans from three angles every inch of her toned physique. She eyes the contours of her breasts in an understated Calvin Klein sports bra; she examines her sculpted midriff and the concavity of her bellybutton. The Gigantic Rock glinting in the mirrors, her thumbs dip below the waistline of her yoga pants, cruise outward along the elastic, and tug once. She bites the corner of her glossy pink lip and scrutinizes every possible curve from the waist down—and with legs like hers, it’s a long way down—before flitting up to find mine, spanning those sexual leagues in an instant, and landing her gaze like a side-kick to the gut. I can barely breathe.

Air squeezes into my lungs like I’m sucking it through a straw-sized snorkel. I’m slouching. Better stand up straight. Unlock my knees. I’ve got to get it together. If she and I are going to live under the same roof, I can’t be falling over every time she has the audacity to exist. Otherwise, I’ll need some kind of house scooter to motor around on my butt all day. Beep-beep, coming through, time to brush my teeth—well, well, don’t you look hot again—okay, faint on you later.





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AUTHOR Bio and Links:

David Beem loves superhero movies, taekwondo, and flossing. He lives in Djibouti with his family and crippling self-doubt. To help actualize David’s inner confidence, visit his website and buy all the stuff: www.davidbeem.com

Amazon author page: https://www.amazon.com/David-Beem/e/B005M4NEYI/ref=sr_ntt_srch_lnk_1

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GIVEAWAY INFORMATION and RAFFLECOPTER CODE

David Beem will be awarding a $25 Amazon or B/N GC to a randomly drawn winner via rafflecopter during the tour.

http://www.rafflecopter.com/rafl/display/28e4345f2946

13 comments:

  1. Welcome to the Angel's blog. I hope you have a great tour. Allana Angel

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  2. Hi, David. I'm just wondering if you have any more stories planned for this series?

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    1. Hi, Bea!

      Yes I do. Planning 1 more TBR April 2020 latest. Also co-authoring a middle grade comedy with my 9-year-old I hope to squeeze out in tandem. We'll see how it goes.

      Thanks for stopping by today!

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    2. That's awesome! I love that you're co-authoring a book with your son. My grandson wants me to write him a book where he's a mad scientist or a super hero. He's still undecided. Lol I told him that we'll have to work on it together, world-building is not my forte.

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    3. Bea that's so cool! Maybe you could sit down with him and let him tell you how the book goes. I thought I'd be doing most of the heavy lifting, but my son gave me most of the story beats. I have to shut him out for a while so I can get things up on stilts before I let him back in or he'll have the whole thing ready to hand into his teacher's desk by Monday morning, lol!

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    4. Lol. Well, I wish you both the best of luck with the story.

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